Mindfulness and Social Anxiety

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Thanks to original article from Maya

If you struggle with social anxiety, you likely know how easy it is to get stuck in your own head. Instead of focusing on the person in front of you, you might agonise about what to say next or worry about blushing. Overthinking and overanalysing social interactions can make it tough to make meaningful connections with others. Fortunately, there are ways to cope with social anxiety and maintain fulfilling relationships – one of the things that can help is mindfulness.

Please note mindfulness is not recommended by NICE guidelines as a therapy – but here we list some of themes within the broader concept of mindfulness that may help some people.

What is mindfulness in the context of social anxiety?

Essentially, mindfulness is a practice that brings you fully into the present moment, in full acceptance. If you’re mindful, you’re not thinking about the past or the future, you’re just focused on the positive aspects of what’s happening right now. You are not getting caught up in your thoughts or judging your experiences (or anxiety). It is a way of really “being” in social situations – where you focus on the situation and people, the task at hand. Accepting anxiety, rather than judging or fighting it, can help your anxiety naturally diminish.

What are the benefits of mindfulness?

There is plenty of research on the benefits of mindfulness in the broader sense and it is known to help cultivate a general sense of well-being. Some benefits in relation to social anxiety include:

● An increase in self-compassion. Mindfulness can help create space between you and your unhelpful thoughts, which makes it easier to treat yourself with compassion instead of judging yourself for your perceived flaws and mistakes.
● More feelings of calm. It is easier to work on your social anxiety, when your brain and body aren’t in panic mode.
● Lower stress and anxiety levels. Over time, you can train how your brain responds to the daily stresses of life and help you be more curious and optimistic towards life and, by extension, other people.

How do you practise mindfulness when on your own?

To get started with on your first as its definitely harder to do in real life social situations.

There are several different ways to practice when you first begin. The essence is that you pay full and complete attention to what you are doing and how it feels. If you’re eating – pay attention to the taste and texture of your food. If you’re going for a walk – pay attention to the wind on your face, the smells around you, and give your entire focus to the good things happening around you.

You can also establish a more formal practice through yoga or meditation. There are many available resources on YouTube and several apps that can support you in a yoga or meditation practice. Try to find one that works for you!

Really, there is no one way to do it. Consistency is the name of the game. Start out with a 5-minute practice every day and build from there. You could even link it with a daily activity you already do – if you have a cup of tea in the morning, try drinking it mindfully.

For more ideas, check out: https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/drugs-and-treatments/mindfulness/mindfulness-exercises-tips/

How do you practise mindfulness when in a social situation?

You can also practise some mindfulness techniques in social situations where you might feel anxious. If you are with other people, try to remain fully engaged with the situation or conversation. Strive to be an active listener. Ask open and relevant questions to show your interest. If you’re eating – pay attention to the taste and texture of your food. The more you focus on the situation and people – rather than your anxiety – the more your anxiety should diminish. Stay totally present in the conversation without judging the other person, yourself, your anxiety or your responses. This is easier said than done, but through time and practice it will come a lot more naturally.

For more on mindful listening, check out: https://www.mindful.org/tuning-in/

If you maintain a regular mindfulness practice, you will likely see the effects seep into your social life. You might find it easier to navigate social situations because you can feel more grounded when meeting new people.

It’s important to note that mindfulness is not a cure-all. It can be difficult to fully focus on the moment when you are experiencing anxious feelings. However, as you practise engaging more positively in conversations, building rapport, and contributing when you can, then mindfulness can be a valuable tool in your mental health toolbox. A dedicated mindfulness practice is not necessarily for everyone, but most people can benefit from being more present in their day-to-day lives.